Friday, December 7, 2012

Trusting God

I don’t have everything and I don’t know everything and every day I'm convinced that I still have more questions than answers. I have a very curious personality and I love discovery and I love research. I think I like this because it's how I'm wired. I'm an answer kind of girl. I love answers. I love knowing. I love learning. I love being informed. Not having answers to all of life's questions I’ve learned through the years is okay. But I wasn't always okay with that. In the past it use to bother me a lot. In fact it made me feel quite barmy because HELLO ... as a woman, I just wanted to know. Can anyone relate??? But through the years, I’ve learned that it's okay to have more questions than answers and I've learned to trust God more and more. Today, I trust Him with everything. 

Trusting God isn't always easy because sometimes there are many voices that you must silence so you can first enter into and develop an ongoing relationship with the One and only living God. You must learn to listen for His voice, to trust Him alone.

To say you trust God when life is going well is easy but to say and to practice that you trust God when life is difficult is a completely different story. Trusting God can feel intimidating when your mountain or your giant is facing you right smack in the face. And it's especially daunting when you don't know God's Word or His promises for you. And beloved reader, there are so many beautiful promises in the Bible to read and remember. Oh how I wish all people knew them. Trusting God is a process of hearing God's Word, reading God's Word, and believing God's word. It also includes opening yourself up to God in conversation, through prayer. And like every healthy relationship you invest in, it grows more intimate with time. 

Half of my life has already been lived and already I can tell that I have a pretty long history of God's faithfulness in my life. One of the benefits of journaling is that I can go back and re-read old journal entries to remember God's faithfulness and how He brought me through a difficult season in my past. That has been an incredibly helpful exercise that increases my faith in Him when I'm going through difficulty. 

What I've learned about trust is this: You can only trust someone when you really get to know them and only when you feel comfortable enough with them. But here's the caveat and a pearl: Even when you feel like you can trust someone, man is capable of letting you down but God will NEVER let you down. God never disappoints and He only desires and provides you with His very best. 

Through the years I have invested time and energy learning about God and getting to know Him and His character through Jesus Christ. I've come to learn that He can in fact be trusted. Trusting God is a life long activity. For me, it's includes surrender and asking God to take my worry and replace it with rest. It's about surrendering fear and asking Him to replace it with peace. And through the years, I've actually uttered the words: "Okay God, I'm tired of doing it my way. My way isn't working. Let's do it Your way. If You lead me and guide me, I will follow." I've learned that God desires the very best for us but He will never force Himself or His way on us. We must choose Him and His ways. The choice is ours. And because God is our Abba Father, He knows best. 

For forty five years, God has provided for my every need. Notice that I didn't say my every "want." Everything I have needed, God has provided. When I think about how my life started and where I am today, I feel rich, rich in every sense of that word. Rich is all encompassing and it's not just about money or things. I'm so thankful for His goodness. God has always been there for me and He has always been more than enough. Through an active prayer life, I'm learning that God's answers are always right on time. Sometimes God answers yes, sometimes He answers no and sometimes He says be still and trust Me. Waiting hasn't and isn’t always easy but I’ve learned that His answers are always timely, just and best. I've learned that I can't always see what He sees but what He sees and what He desires for us is good and it is He who I trust. I want what He wants for my life. I want to live at the very center of His will and I want to become every bit of the woman He created me to be. 

Sometimes when I think about how much God loves us, it overwhelms me. Have you ever experienced that? When I sit quietly and ponder this, I am filled with so many wonderful emotions and so much gratitude. Today was one of those days where I sat and pondered His love for me and it overwhelmed me. Today my spirit feels a deep sense of gratitude for who He is and for what He is doing in my life. I can’t always see it, but my spirit senses it. Have you ever felt that?

Through the years I have also learned that nobody could ever really love us unconditionally. Sure, people try but only God can love unconditionally. And nothing you could ever do or say or have ever said or done or didn't say or do could EVER make God stop loving you. Ever. Please re-read that last sentence as often as you need to. I've learned that man does in fact desire to love unconditionally but he is not capable because he is not God. Man is human. God is not. Human beings often stop loving because of deep hurts or disappointment or fear but God never stops loving you. Never. Only God can love unconditionally. Oh that He knows us and still loves us amazes me. That God hears the cries of our hearts and responds so tenderly moves me to tears.

Today, I’m thankful, so thankful for God and to God. I’m thankful in the midst of where I am and who I am. I'm thankful that He is faithful and that I can trust Him. Last week Wednesday, my Pastor's wife, Grace was teaching and within the first five minutes of teaching she said the words: "Trust God alone." I can't remember what else she said that evening only that she said to trust God alone. That was my take away. That was my word from God. It is He who I trust and I'm trusting Him alone. 

God you know me and you love me anyway. Thank you for your unconditional love. My cup runneth over …   

Until next time,


Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. His love endures forever. ~ Psalm 136:1

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.        ~ Proverbs 3:5

But I trust in you, O LORD; I say, "You are my God." ~ Psalm 31:14

O LORD Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you. ~ Psalm 84:12

Blessed is the man who makes the LORD his trust, who does not look to the proud,  to those who turn aside to false gods. ~ Psalm 40:4